Chorus call

Full cast/chorus next Wednesday - rough staging.
Full cast/chorus next Thursday - rough singing.

Spelling Bee Page Endings

Hat tip to Sam May.
(He does know this; he did poorly last year at Nationals.)

RONA
BUT IT’S A VERY NICE
VERY VERY NICE…

2
Returning after last season’s tragic setback: William Barfee.

BARFEE
It’s pronounced Barfee; there’s an accent ague.

(MARCY enters. She’s calm, you might even mistakenly think blasé.)

3
(with hostility)
Excuse me, I’ve marked this area off with invisible tape.

4
CONEYBEAR
HOLY COW

SCHWARZY
WE SHALL TAKE A SOLEMN VOW
TO CONCENTRATE ON WINNING

5
(Rona calls names of four audience volunteers, selected through interview process before the show)

[first and last name of volunteers one, two, three, four]

6
(Line changes with theatre configuration—eg: Have you ever been in a gymnasium with chandeliers before?)

7
*[Ad lib note: “fallen ill”= occasional ad lib space.]

8
RONA
And now for the official spelling bee rules.

9
WE WILL RING

SPELLERS
YOU WILL RING

10
microphone RONA provides “color commentary,” facts about the speller purportedly from their registration forms.)

11
Leaf! Phone!

CONEYBEAR
Thanks! I got it!
Hello, Leaf speaking. Uh huh. Uh, huh. Uh, huh.
You’re kidding? I’m gonna represent the Basin in the bee? Wow, I can’t believe it.

12
Is that a word?

PANCH
That’s a word, yes.

CONEYBEAR
No way, what does it mean?

13
It’s unbelievable, I just said the first letters that came into my head, and that “y” was really…

ALL
Shhh.

14
(calling her back to spelling reality)
Boanthropy.

OLIVE
Is that from the Latin root bo meaning ox, and the Greek root anthro meaning man?

15
SHE TALKS INTO HER HAND AND TURNS ASIDE

OLIVE
SO I WILL NOT MAKE A MISTAKE AND BE DISQUALIFIED

16
(Rona gives volunteer words to spell. Speller will not act and not ask definition of word.)

17
BARFEE
Yes, of course. Lugubrious, meaning extremely sad and droopy?

PANCH
More or less, yes.

18
(to audience volunteer)
Mexican.

19
Thank you. Phylactery. P-H-Y-L-A-C-T-E-R-Y. Phylactery.

PANCH
That is correct. Mr. Tolentino.

20
Omphaloskepsis. O…M…P…H…A…L-O-S-K-E-P-S-I-S. Omphaloskepsis.

PANCH
That is correct.

21
PANCH
Spell “gerbil.”
(Coneybear spells “gerbil,” as song continues.)

22
ALL SPELLERS
GODDAMN IT!

CHIP
IT IS SUCH A CALAMITY.

23
(Audience volunteers are engineered to dance in a circle alone, while other spellers point and laugh.)

MITCH
LIFE IS RANDOM

24
CHIP OTHER SPELLERS
WIN
THEY DON’T WIN LIFE IS PANDE-MONIUM
THEY DON’T WIN LIFE IS PANDE-MONIUM
THEY DON’T WIN

25
Thithtitith? May I please have the definition of that word?

PANCH
“An inflammation of the urinary bladder”

26
SCHWARZY
Yes—

DAN DAD
Maybe it’s time for a break?

27
What’s it mean?

PANCH
“A South American rodent of the genus Myoprocta, resembling an agouti”

28
FAMILY
DUMB KID

CONEYBEAR
HOW COULD A FLEA
SUCH AS ME

29
CONEYBEAR
(stunned)
I MIGHT BE SMART.

30
OLIVE
Flagellate—um—that’s a verb right?

PANCH
Yes.

31
SCHWARZY
Honestly, I think there’s a good chance I would do okay, but it’s unlikely I’d win the whole thing, I’m a good speller, but I’m not a truly great speller, and though I have trained hard there’s so much luck involved.

32
(Rona comment from list, at discretion of actor playing RONA.

Panch/Speller ad lib on word, definition, sentence from list, at discretion of actor playing PANCH. At this point, actor playing Panch has decided which volunteer should be the last one standing and attempts to rig accordingly. The one who is

33
#5—Magic Foot

34
DON’T GO KAPUT FOOT
MAGIC FOOT MAGIC FOOT MAGIC FOOOOOOOOT!
WRITE THE GODDAMN LETTER
DOOT GA DOOT GA DOOT MAGIC FOOOOOOOOT!
COME ON FOOT, COME ON!

35
Miss Park.

RONA
Miss Park skipped fourth and fifth grades. She’s on track to become the youngest high school freshman in parochial school history.

36
PANCH
Why would you want to do that?

CHIP
I’d rather not say?

37
#6—Pandemonium (Reprise)

(can overlap above)
“If you start to spell a word you may start over…

38
(MITCH looks to RONA; RONA looks to PANCH; PANCH looks at the bell—and rings it.
Ding)

MITCH
Let’s go kid.

39
RONA comment from list, at discretion of actor playing Rona
Word given to last remaining audience volunteer. Volunteer is told there is no known definition. Audience member usually spells the word “correctly”—i.e. unless their answer is entirely implausible, they are retained, to the great surprise of PANCH and RONA, amazed at the volunteer’s good spelling.

40
SPELL WITH PATIENCE AND CARE
THAT DUDE IS MY PRAYER

41
GOODBYE!

42
HAVE BEEN
ELIM-
INATED

YOU WANNA KNOW HOW?

43
MY LIFE!

ADULTHOOD BRINGS IT’S OWN PECULIAR REJECTION
WHICH IS WHY I’M SELLING THIS P.T.A. CONFECTION.

44
BARFEE
Well it’s a disgusting fruit, and I can’t keep them down.

45
Ladies and gentlemen our final spellers. Let’s give them a hand.
We have, home-schooled from the Basin, Leaf Coneybear.

46
SCHWARZY
I HOPE YOU CAN LOVE ME, AMERICA.
I’M GUNNING FOR FIRST PRICE.
HERE’S WHY YOU SHOULD LOVE ME, AMERICA:
MY NEEDS I CANNOT OVEREMPHASIZE.

47
Don’t call her that, Carl.
CARL DAD
Sorry. Her “Birth Mother.”

48
BE SMART, BE COOL
WOE IS ME BE SMART, BE COOL
BE SMART, BE

49
BARFEE
It’s Barfee.

PANCH
Please spell PALAVER.

50
BARFEE
It’s Mr. Barfee.

PANCH
Please spell WEEVIL.

51
SCHWARZY
L-I

CONEYBEAR
V-A

52
TO ME IT BRINGS
A PLAINTIVE AIR.
I ALWAYS THOUGHT THAT LIFE WAS FAIR
I MEAN I NEVER FELT A SMIDGEON OF DESPAIR
THEY SAY A BELL CAN BREAK YOUR HEART;

53
Miss Park speaks five languages.

MARCY
(SHE’s had it with these comments)
No I don’t.

54
AS MY LIFE UNSCROLLS
UNAMAZED AM I
I DON’T LIKE TO BRAG
AND I WONT CAUSE I DON’T HAVE TO BUT
I SPEAK SIX LANGUAGES.

55
MARCY GIRLS
I KNOW SIX LANGUAGES SHE KNOWS SIX LANGUAGES
THAT’S ONE, TWO, SHE KNOWS, SHE KNOWS
THREE, FOUR, SHE KNOWS, SHE KNOWS
FIVE, SHE KNOWS, SHE KNOWS
SIX! SIX!

56
MARCY
How are you?

JESUS
I’m good. Is that your prayer, Marcy, for a more difficult word?

57
I BLEW THAT WORD SHE BLEW THAT WORD
PRAISE JESUS! PRAISE JESUS!
LIFE HAS SUCH POSSIBILITY

58
Miss Ostrovsky’s line Rona speaking. Just one minute, Logainne.
(as RONA takes the call, SCHWARZY begins to complain)

59
SCHWARZY
And are there any alternate definitions?

PANCH
Yes—a channel to drain or carry off surplus water.

60
Oh that’s no good.
(aside to Schwarzy)
No, no, let that dry.

61
I apologize for that incident. In my defense I’d like to point out that I am lactose intolerant. Miss Ostrovsky.

OLIVE
(to Rona)
What did my dad say?

62
WHEN YOU WERE A BEGINNER.
YOU WERE THE PERFECT CHILD.

WE ALWAYS KNEW, WE ALWAYS KNEW, YOU WERE A CHAMPION.
YOUR SADNESS FILLED MY ROOM.

63
I THINK DAD IS ANGRY, MA,
AND I DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO.
MAMA, MAMA, MAMA
SHANTI, SHANTI, AND OM.

64
I-I-I LOVE YOU
I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU BABY (DEAR)

MOM
AND I SWEAR IT’S TRUE.

65
(tries to get BARFEE’s attention to warn him about the sticky spot on the floor)
William. William.
(RONA and PANCH shush SCHWARZY.)

66
BARFEE
Ew. C-R-E-P…U?
(spells rest of word quickly thinking he’s missed on the “u”)
S-C-U-L-E. Crepescule.

67
So simple?

PANCH
So simple.

68
15b—Rona Moment #3

69
(for Olive’s benefit)
Zoonosis. Yes, of course. Does that happen to be the longest word that can be turned upside down and it’s still the same word?
70
TO THINK THAT I MIGHT WIN IT
IS ASTOUNDING NEEWS
AND I’M ABOUT TO BURST.

BARFEE
R-O Astro

71
SECOND I WON’T COME IN… AHH
I WON’T COME IN… AHH
SECOND AHH

72
BARFEE
(turns and notices OLIVE)
You…
(It’s really the first time HE’s thought about how someone else might feel.)

73
YES, SECOND SECOND IF FOR EVER EVER EVER
I WILL COME IN SECOND SECOND I WAS ALWAYS STUCK IN SECOND
OOH WILL I COME IN SECOND
OOH WILL I COME IN
OOH

74
exception!
(PANCH is the only one to notice OLIVE in background looking very sad.)

75
(to Barfee, at end of reception line)
Good bee.

76
Vice Principal Panch found a new passion in life. Her name was Rona Lisa Peretti. After courting her tirelessly for over two years, she took out a restraining order on him. Still, he was grateful for the opportunity to experience love.

77
came in 42nd. (Top 50) In later years he grew up to be incredibly handsome and to gain fame and notoriety for his pioneering efforts in the combined scientific fields of psychiatry and podiatry, otherwise known as: poschietry.

78
COMPANY
25TH ANNUAL
PUTNAM COUNTY SPELLING BEE.
(The COMPANY bows.)

Spelling Bee Bios

Bios

In the program will be cast biographies of each cast member. A performance bio usually has the actor's name, character, training, past roles/performances, and special thanks. Could you please write about 30 words describing yourself, your role, your experience, your thanks to . . . and so on. Below are some examples as a guide. Either enter yours on edecker.blogspot.com as an anonymous comment, e-mail it to ericjohndecker@yahoo.com, or hand it to me at rehearsal.


SAMPLES:
Sara Decker (Olive Madison): has been seen here in Lanesboro as Coyote and Sister Sunshine in the past two summers' melodramas, as well as in the Ole & Lena production. She lives the Drama & Comedy of Life at home with three kids and a Theater Director husband. Ongoing Ha and Wow.

Karrie Ellingson (Sylvie, producer): This is Karrie’s fourth appearance with the Lanesboro Community Theater and her second go at producing. When she is not pursuing her hidden talents, she is working extremely hard at her job of 20 years at St. Mary’s Hospital.

Elizabeth Shea (Klezmer, Thief, Chorus): is thrilled to be in her second play here at JM. Her most recent roles include Option Three in A Whole New You, Marian Paroo in The Music Man, Golde in Fiddler on the Roof, and Maria in The Sound of Music. She thanks her families for their continued support of her onstage career.

Arij Mikati (Chorus): A familiar face on the JM stage, Arij Mikati has made her most recent appearances as Francine in The Movie Game, Susie in Babes in Arms, and Essie in You Can't Take it With You. She is back again in her most impressive performance ever as a Sweatshop Worker and Chorus Member in the moving and controversial play, RAGS.

Robert Croghan (Hamlet, Chorus): After being in "You Can't Take It With You", "Babes in Arms", and "Once Upon A Mattress", Robert is making another debut and enjoying every minute of it. Robert would like to thank his parents for all the racket they had to put up with.

1st week rehearsal

THURS, Sept 23:
3:15 Rona, Olive, Schwarzy, Marcy, Mitch, Panch, Leaf, Barfee, Chip
#1,#20,#1a
4:30 Good-byes - 6a, 1-2-3, 21
5:00 Rona

MON. Sept 27
3:15 Olive #2,#14, all solo lines
3:45 Leaf #4, #11a, all solo lines
4:15 Chip #3,#9, all solo lines
5:00 Panch #1a, #6, #11

TUES. Sept 28
3:15 Barfee & Olive (briefly) #17a. #16, all solo lines
3:45 Mitch #6. #7, (#15), all solo lines
4:15 Schwarzy & Carl, Dan (briefly) (#15), #10, solo lines
4:45 Marcy #12, #13, solo lines

THURS. Sept 30
3:15 Entire Cast - warm up
3:30 #3, #6, #18, #1, #20, All Good-byes (6a, 1-2-3, etc) 4:30 Marcy & All girls in cast #12, #13 5:00 Olive, Olive's Mom, Olive"s Dad #14


Great read-through. I think we accomplished Steve Scott's goal for a first rehearsal: "Get them to show up for the second one." We have a terrific cast and it was fun for me to see the humor of the show start peeking through.


Heads-up: Deb will again be our choreographer (7th year!), and again, her availability will be 5-7 on Tuesdays and Thursdays. She would also like two Saturday mornings so Tony Carlson (who has been helping us since High School Musical!) can come back and guest choreograph a couple of numbers.

Paul is putting together a crew calendar; stay tuned.